Mother & I
23.1.2013,
Mumbai
There is joy in a routine and a routine
tells more about a character than we realise. My mother as long as she lived
started her morning by feeding grains to the sparrows and the pigeons. While
she brewed tea for the rest of the family she opened her kitchen window and
invited her friends to be a part of her domesticity. She placed a bowl of water
on the window sill for the thirsty birds and the birds came every day to give
her company.
After bath, mother showered water to the
rising sun, then the Tulsi plant and finally a plate of prasad with a lamp to
her Gods in the temple.
When it was lunch hour the first
Chappati was reserved for the crow and strangely he always knew when she was
ready because he arrived on the window sill as soon as she put his bread on the
window sill. The second Chappati rolled in ghee and jaggery was for the cow.
When she had finished cooking she went barefoot on the street waiting for a cow
to pass by and when she did, mother fed her with her hands and touched her back
to seek blessings.
In the olden days the entire family
assembled on the floor for meals but even later when we began eating on dining
tables, she always commenced her meal with the first morsel of everything in
her plate offered to the ancestors on the side. Next she sprinkled water around
the plate this was to ward off the evil eye and is a ritual followed in many
traditional homes even today.
When she was no more for a long time I
followed her practice and started my day by offering grains to the pigeon and
the sparrow, when father was no more she believed that he visited the family in
the form of the crow and cooked his favourite dishes for me. When she was no
more, I was visited by two crows and I remembered to serve them my parents’ favorite
dishes.
I did that for a long time but in the
fancy apartment I live currently, the society rules prohibit us to put grains
and bread on the window sill and soil the building. These are times of hygiene
not tradition and I understand without cynicism. So do the sparrows, the
pigeons and the crows that have gradually learned to stay away from us humans?
They no more visit our homes to announce a guest, the sparrows and the pigeons
are harshly evacuated from the windows before they can build a nest or lay an
egg.
I don’t anymore feed the cows because
they never pass by the lane I live. If I have to feed them I have to visit the
temple and there too I cannot feed the cow unless I first feed her with the
ladoos I purchase from the cowherd caretaker.
I long to offer the first morsel of my
meal to my ancestor exactly the way my mother did but the few times I did I was
subjected to scornful looks and since then did not attempt to commence and
conclude a meal by sprinkling water around my plate.
At home I do.
My mother was fortunate, she followed
her instincts. In the changing times I have to change to not attract attention.
Bhawana
Somaaya/ www.bhawanasomaaya.com
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